How to Find Yourself by Connecting With Others
1. Listen to your friend vent.
Inviting a friend to coffee and letting them talk about themselves will not only score you major brownie points, but it will also give you a chance to learn from their experiences. Sometimes, it’s those closest to us who are dealing with the same things we are, and they can offer a new perspective.
To be a good listener, Mark Goulston, an author and business psychiatrist, explains in the Harvard Business Review that you should ask specific questions to help direct your friend’s emotions. Try asking questions like, “What are you most angry/frustrated/etc. about?” “Don’t take issue with them or get into a debate,” Goulston explains. “Just know that they really need to get this off their chest—and if you listen without interrupting them, while also inviting them to say even more, they will.”
2. Talk to someone new.
While bugging that person with their eyes closed and headphones in on the subway might not be the best idea, you never know what you might learn from chatting with the person sitting next to you on an airplane or bus stop bench.
A recent study showed that participants who were told to talk to strangers on the bus or train had a more positive experience than those who didn’t. “Human beings are social animals,” the study’s abstract reminds us.
Challenge yourself to strike up a conversation with one new person each week—and see what happens.
3. Read fiction and watch movies.
Who knew that cozying up with a blanket and spending the evening with a book or blockbuster could be good for your health? Movies and fiction are great places to find stories that we can relate to.
Better yet, pick up a book that features a main character that is different from you. That way, you can broaden your understanding of someone you might never come into daily contact with otherwise.
4. Listen to podcasts.
Just like reading fiction and watching movies, listening to podcasts gives us insight into others’ experiences. Podcasts also feature nonfiction stories and are great for listening to on the go.
SOURCE:success.com
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