ETIQUETTES

Etiquettes Still Exist! 5 Must-Haves For Every Human The world is evolving and so are rules, behavioural patterns, beliefs and acceptable norms. People define what they see as suitable or not, on a daily basis, using various factors as the yardstick. It however remains constant that polite behaviours, respect and good manners still exist and are necessary! In times when the eyes were not widely opened to civilisation and Western education, our forefathers had specific forms of behaviour that are acceptable by their societies And now that we are in a global world and the average human is civilised, etiquettes are still much needed. It is however saddening that the current generation is taking almost everything in life for granted, ‘Etiquettes’ being one of them. We learn on paper and in theory, but we do not make use of them. Maybe they do not make sense to us or we do not see them as necessary. Day in day out varieties of slangs and cliches good seem to override and threaten the existence of our good manners. Etiquettes assist co-existence and networking, and have changed and evolved over the years too. They are applicable to virtually every part of human life – profession, hygiene, family, food, dress sense/fashion, communication (mail, telephone, social media, etc) and many more. Here, we are going to be looking at a list 5 etiquettes every human must know and have, under the subs of Telephone Conversation and Interpersonal Relationship. Telephone Conversation Telephone etiquettes are the most underrated yet one of the greatest must-haves for every human, especially nowadays that anything happens on the phone. Job interviews are conducted via phone calls, contracts are won, telephone conversations are recorded for crimes investigation and a lot more activities that can make or mar one’s life. Let’s create a scenario with which we analyse the etiquettes – Say you get a phone call notification from an unsaved contact. Etiquette 1 – Politeness: Politeness is better than logic, according to Josh Billings, an American writer. The fact that you do not know who called demands you to be extra careful, cautious and polite. Greetings is first necessary and some level of respect. If you don’t want to do that, you can as well pick up the call and let the caller start the conversation while you try to process who it is and the level of respect to be awarded. But above all, ensure you exhibit some level of friendliness and calm. This however goes beyond telephone conversation. Etiquette 2 – Introduction: Have you ever made a call to a longtime friend and you hear “Hello, who is this?”. The effect varies from one individual to another but it can really be irritating. Many times when we receive calls from an unknown number, we tend to be so curious to know who the caller is and the purpose of the call. With that, we go ahead being overly inquisitive and that doesn’t seem good. When receiving such calls, it is necessary for you to be calm and hear out the caller before queries. After all, the person calling must have a mission. However, if the caller is not giving one, then you politely demand. On the caller’s end, do not hesitate to give an introduction of yourself and the purpose of the call. It is not good for one to be asked for an introduction before one gives it, since one’s is the initiator of the call Etiquette 3 – Terminating The Call: This is my most disgusting moment in telephone conversation, I must admit! If I may ask, who do you think should end the call after the conversation – the caller or the receiver? Most of the people very close to me can bear witness of how I call back after our conversation, just to emphasize the fact that I called and they shouldn’t terminate the call on my behalf. I mean “are you trying to save my airtime for me, or you are tired of me talking and you need to discharge me?” What if I remember something as we round off the conversation and I need to tell you quickly, or even you? It is expected that the caller gives at least some seconds of dead air after the conversation before he/she terminates it, just in case anything pops up on the mind. Don’t be so stingy that you won’t afford to let some seconds read from your airtime! It is also very paramount that the receiver holds on at the other side for the seconds to pass by, before dropping the phone. Most importantly, DON’T end the call you didn’t initiate, UNLESS the caller requests you to do that for him/her please 🙏. Interpersonal Interaction Every of our activities as human involves and has direct or indirect effect(s) on another, hence we are prone to erring and offending one another. The scenario to be used here is a public setting, a bus with passengers or a bus stop for instance. Etiquette 4 – Taking Excuses The Right Way: Yorubas will say “pele l’ako, o l’abo”, meaning “How we use/say the Sorry word determine its outcome – either violence or peace”. It is believed that every African man wants to be faster, better and ahead of the other, hence we always rush in doing things. So if in the process of you rushing to catch a bus, someone is in front of you, you obviously need to excuse yourself. But eew!, many people must have pushed you with their bags, giving you a you’d-better-leave-my-front look, while saying ‘Excuse me’. But why? And as humans, God didn’t give us the opportunity to remove our feelings like clothes, so everyone carries his about! So if in the process of pushing and all, the other party spills out his frustrations, gbam! – conflict occurs – which may eventually hinder what we were aiming at. The major reason we have heavy traffic on Lagos roads, is simply because one driver is trying to outsmart the other, not wanting to take proper excuse and the other feels ‘hell no, you can’t cheat me!’ So why don’t we do it the right way and enjoy peace, and together, we make the world a better place? Etiquette 5 – Apologies: It is so funny how people will step on you and then straighten their face like nothing happened. I always feel it when my leg steps on something other than the ground, but how people don’t is what I don’t understand. Saying a word of apology will not take anything from you! Don’t just wait till someone tells you “Hey, you hit me with your bag” and you begin to give explanations “After all, I didn’t know. It wasn’t intentional”. No one has said it is intentional, just develop a habit of apologizing and it will save you a lot of stress. The funniest situation is when one sneezes, coughs or mistakenly farts. We have so taken these things personally that we always expect the other person to tell us ‘sorry’ or ‘take care’ when in the real sense, we are the ones depositing bacteria to them. Whether you are hit with a bag or you hit someone, maybe it’s just your finger that touched the passenger seated beside you or you sneezed, just understand the fact that everyone goes about with his frustration and utter some words of apologies! You will be glad you did. Now moving out of the painted scenario, to other phases of human interpersonal communication, learnt to apologise and mean it. I am on this table too and I am working towards being a better person. Saying sorry is good, being sorry is the better! Make a check today, improve and let’s get better together! By:Adenike Sobo