STAGE FRIGHT
By : Michael Igele
ACT 1 SCENE 1
John, a final year student of University of Benin has been preparing for a seminar presentation. He has wondered how to overcome stage fright. The topic is very familiar to him and he believes he can do well but for stage fright.
ACT 1 SCENE 1
Enter John: Good morning sir!
Pharmacist: Good morning young man, how can I help you?
John: Please sir, I am presenting a seminar this afternoon, do you have any drug that can suppress stage fright?
Pharmacist: There are no such drugs except hard drugs which I do not sell, but strictly on prescription by the Doctor. You mean you don’t know what to do to overcome stage frights? So you just go to school without anything in your head. All you do is to read all the way but still leave empty space in your brain. When I was in school, I knew what to do. What everybody does including your professors and doctors before going for lectures.
John: (covered by curiosity) please sir help me! I don’t understand.
Pharmacist: You see why I say you have nothing in this big head of yours. See, “Drink no longer water, but take little wine for thy stomach sake”. (1 Timothy 5:23). You know why? Everything that you need is in your stomach. The confidence that you need and the fear that pursues you. You suffer from the negative reaction of the Adrenaline which your anxiety cause to secrete to your nervous system. When you take little alcohol, all this nervous system that are alerted will softly go to sleep and stage fright would be conquered for that period. So, you see, the Bible is a wonderful book and even has a scientific backup. You who is an “S.U”. (Scripture Unionist) still don’t know of its secrets.
John: So, the Bible supports wine! Alcohol in modern transformation. Why am I wasting time? Professors, doctors and other lecturers use it. Then, what is good for the goose, is good for the gander. (John walks out to the Mama Urhobo beer and pepper soup joint).
Mama Urhobo: John! John!!, long time, wetin dey happen now, shey na Acada dey do you like dis? Oya, banga soup dey, starch dey, eba don ready, even beans and yam, which, you want? because every-dey! Abi na pepper soup?
John: No mama, today I want jump over the moon and I want wetin go shine the eyes so that no evil spirit go try my courage.
Mama Urhobo: Blood of Jesus! Ehh! Johnny, wetin happen to Bible?
John: Bible say make we take little wine make the body for dey Kamkpe!
Mama Urhobo: Oya na, Johnny one! Shine the eyes na!
ACT 1 SCENE II
Enter John (he sees the panel of judges all seated and the students in their various seats. John entered the hall with a degree of high confidence).
John: Good morning class Rep, fellow HODS and co-lecturers. I shall be presenting this morning “Diffusion theory of social change”. Please I need absolute silence in this hall. Attendance is going round for all Doctors and Professors, be sure to sign in your names as marks will be awarded. And you Mr. Sly, standup! – turn around! I have been watching you since I was in 100 level, you are always shabbily dressed and now, see you, doing low-waist! Now get out! You’ll be used as a scape-goat to other poorly dressed lecturers. (surprises in the hall as students and lecturers wonder what was wrong with him). Adesuwa, stand up! Yes; I like your blush! (Adesuwa twist stylishly and wave her hands then sat down). You see, looking good is good. Look at Prof. Mrs. Adamu, you will agree with me that she looks well fed and remarkably groomed (Prof. (Mrs). Adamu smiled with a little surprise) (he went on and finished delivering his lectures).
(Question from Prof Oko)
Prof. Oko: Youngman, what is the confluence between Diffusion and Modernisation?
John: I thought I said that during the cause of my discussion I hate repeating myself. Okay you, Prof. Obi, answer that question, and if you can’t, the two of you get out of this hall! You think to stand here and talk is easy? After spending sleepless nights doing research and rehearsing, you come here only to ask frivolous questions.
Prof. Obi and Oko quickly call the security department who
immediately sent a team of security personnel to the hall. After thorough medical investigation, it was found out that the Youngman took twelve shots of shekpe and four bottles of star (shine shine Bobo).
John is to face another panel for unruly behaviour and gross-indiscipline.
Learning point:
Quite a number of persons have wrestled endlessly with stage fright but the Victor often seemed to be the Fright. Super stars and top government functionaries face this monster called stage fright. A very brilliant person could be rubbished by stage fright. Stage fright is often connected to low self esteem.
Constant interaction with people of different calibres could help reduce stage fright. The best is when a person is adequately exposed to seminars and symposia which may help reduce fear,low self esteem and complex of inferiority. To overcome fright, most people have taken to several means that cause them harm instead of the opposite as they proposed.
If you have a better view on how best one can over come stage fright ,let us enjoy your welcomed comment. via our email. peakpathwaymagazine@gmail.com
We shall meet at the top!
Michael Igele popularly known as 'De Angel' is a graduate of Sociology and Anthropology Department, University of Benin. He won the first prize in poetry in the annual Awards for Excellence organized by Creative Writers Workshop University of Benin chapter in his first year which followed by other Awards. In his Penultimate year,he had a red carpet book launch.Two out of his first eight books were launched in style, Root and Branches,a heart breaking drama and Night of Redemption, an award winning novella, a chronicle. He has written up to thirteen books among which, one he dedicated to God. "Do it well in the name of God"
