Peak Pathway Magazine's Blog : career development forum

1. Identify the illusion. “The task we must set for ourselves is not to feel secure, but to be able to tolerate insecurity.” —Erich Fromm Fromm, a psychologist and philosopher, reveals an important detail about one of the sneakiest ways insecurities gain their power: illusion. Insecurities expose expectations and these expectations turn into standards. Growing up, you absorbed certain standards about who you should be and what you should do to merit acceptance. Some standards can be valid and healthy, but more often, they become intertwined with false, harmful illusions. Those illusions become toxic to your self-esteem. The most commonly accepted illusion is that it’s possible to exist with no insecurity at all. You begin believing that strong people don’t ever doubt themselves, or that confidence is a gift some people are born with (and you didn’t’t win that lotto), so you continue striving to eliminate your insecurities to meet that standard—instead of learning to neutralize

1. Keep your word to yourself. When you do what you say you’re going to do, you build self-respect and a positive identity. Successful people understand that every time you break the promises you make to yourself, you feed your identity as an impostor and weaken your self-confidence as a person of action. For example, if you commit to exercising 30 minutes each day, then do it. Regardless of the outcome,   your character   is being positively molded, and that will generate momentum along your journey. 2. Use envy to your advantage. Wanting something you don’t currently have is a behavior rooted in your DNA. But just because it’s a normal feeling to have doesn’t mean you can’t control it or leverage it to your benefit. Successful people understand that beneath the layers of envy lies a core need they desire. Ask yourself why you feel envy. If it’s money, for example, what would that money represent for you? Most often, it’s time and freedom. Once you know the root cause, you

1. Self-Awareness Knowing your strengths and weaknesses   is not as easy as it sounds. To understand our personal surpluses and deficits is not an option on our journey to personal greatness. If we want to drive our performance, then we must be able to manage our emotions in ways that energize and direct that drive. The research is plentiful that IQ accounts for about 20 percent of a person’s success. Moods account for much more. If we are not aware of our moods, then they can end up controlling our behavior in counterproductive ways. Self-awareness means we are growing in our ability to read our emotions accurately. This gives us   the ability to self-regulate and self-manage destructive moods and attitudes. Mood mastery is necessary for personal mastery. Be self-aware instead of self-conscious. 2. Self-Affirmation We know it’s not healthy to speak against or gossip about others.   It becomes even more destructive when we use words to speak against ourselves.   Self-affir

1. Compartmentalize projects. Switching between types of tasks is mentally draining. Instead, bundle related projects together and tackle them all at once. For instance, start your day addressing customer service challenges. Then, move onto marketing campaigns. Afterwards, review new product opportunities. This will make it easier to finalize tasks when you don’t have to mentally toggle back and forth dozens of times each day. 2. Track your time. Tracking time   is like a budget for money. It makes me see what I was doing mindlessly in terms of not using time in the best way, and where I can make immediate improvements. I use a time tracker app, which helps me determine what I do every minute of the workday. 3. Develop a code for when you’re busy. We have all been in a situation where we want to get back to work but we can’t quite end conversations with our managers. So we internally developed a code that means, “Please don’t get offended, but I really need to tackle this t

1. Take five minutes to list out the things “you were going to do tomorrow.” On a blank sheet of paper, note several important activities you are delaying or have put on hold. 2. Look at your list—and do one thing on it right now. Put the energy you’ve been directing toward   excuses   into the activity you’ve been avoiding. Action eliminates anxiety. 3. Pick a time (today) to work on the list. If getting started is the hard part for you, set aside a designated time slot, at least 30 minutes, for work specifically on one job, project or personal goal that you’ve been “leaving until later.” 4. Quit trying to be perfect. What counts is quality of effort, not perfect results. Don’t let yourself get bogged down with   a preoccupation for perfectionism. 5. If what you’re putting off involves other people, talk to them. Your reasons for delaying action might be imaginary. Lack of communication often turns molehills into mountains. 6. Ask yourself,   What’s the worst thi

1. Love Now, this all depends on your definition of love. Most people think that love is a feeling, but I would strongly debate that point. Actually, the concept of “like” is really about feelings. When you say you like someone, you are talking about how you feel. But when you say that you love someone, you are not necessarily talking about how you feel about them. Love is much deeper than a feeling.   Love is a commitment   we make to people to always treat that person right and honorably . Yes, for those we become especially close to, we will have feelings of love, but I believe it is time for us to re-examine what we mean by love. We must expand our definition of what love means by including the commitment aspect of love. For healthy relationships, we must love everyone. We may not like them based on how we feel about them, but we should love them based on our definition of love above which in turn determines how we should act toward them; that is, treat them right and honorab

1. It presents you with new opportunities. Growth in yourself eventually leads you to   new opportunities, opportunities that don’t come about   until   you grow into the person who is ready for them. All you have to do is focus on self-improvement—start by reading personal development articles, books, blogs—and implement the things you learn into your own life. 2. It increases your self-esteem to new levels. Self-confidence   is ultimately the starting point to following your dreams—you have to believe in yourself and your dreams enough to go after them. As you grow, you’re building up that mindset, that belief. When I picked up my very first personal development book— Think and Grow Rich   by Napoleon Hill—that’s when my   self-esteem   started rising, when I really started to believe in myself and my goals. Reading success books was what pushed me to grow, to change, the motivation behind my goals. 3. It can help you become a better version of yourself. Becoming a bet

1. Embrace life, don’t resist it. When things aren’t working, our first action is often resistance. Instead of resisting, take a moment to consider what isn’t working and why. This kind of information is valuable. Tough times can be used to disrupt stagnant patterns in thinking.   If we embrace the disruption, it can have a   purifying   effect that knocks off the rust and barnacles we naturally collect on our daily voyage.   Embracing life   is resisting stagnation. Life might wreck your plans when your plans are about to wreck you.   So pay close attention. 2. Affirm yourself, don’t degrade yourself. One of the most common ways to degrade ourselves is to ask the wrong questions. Wrong questions are dis-empowering. They immediately change our   subconscious thought patterns   from positive to negative, or vice versa. They are powerful. Question:   Why can’t I lose weight?   Answer:   Because you’re a pig! Question:   Why can’t I do things right?   Answer:   Because you’