THE REFINERY, THE REFINER AND THE REFINED
By :Okeme Dorcas Enechojo
Gone are those days when we talk of being the unimaginable. These are the tests to get started in life; what do I want, what can I do, what makes me happy, can I be fulfilled if I invest my time, energy and resources in this project? These and many more are the questions one should asked whenever there is a dilemma in choosing a career or taking a decision.
It is no longer news that the ability of an individual to maintain self motivation, to set and meet goals is a topic that interests the right thinking folks. Self-determination seeks to explain intrinsic motivation. I’m sure someone will sigh and say ' oh, not again, come off this, we've heard about this many times!'. Of course yes, we've heard about this whole nugget several times. But wait a minute, it’s not enough reading and having knowledge about a term, but the issue and challenge many people have is putting those things learnt into practice, which makes the difference.
Intrinsic motivation comes from within an individual rather than from outside the person. Let's take the athletes as case study. Whenever they are faced with a challenge on the field, there is always something within which keeps telling them that; come on guy, you can get there, just a little more push and before you know what's happening, there comes a winner. That's the intrinsic motivation. Nobody will believe in your dreams when you the dreamer do not possess even an atom of belief in your dream. So, permit me to say now that ' intrinsic motivation comes from within the individual rather than from the outside '
Come with me and let's reason together about this whole intrinsic motivation. Why do people wake up every morning and set out for their work places? Of course, it's nothing other than the reward at the end of the day, and I hear someone whisper to me 'wages or salary' and I see reasons with him then I say to myself, this is the motive.
Friends, let your motivation be with a price tag, let it come from within, be realistic and achievable as well. If you've got a dream, pursue it with passion and make a target for yourself (i.e. time-bound). The slogan should be, ’if I can conceive it, then I can achieve it’. Then, stay with your dream.
The motivation behind a person’s goal setting affects the outcome. The Self-determination scheme states “Extrinsic goals such as financial success, appearance, and popularity/fame have been specifically contrasted with intrinsic goals such as community, close relationships, and personal growth, with the former more likely associated with lower wellness and greater ill-being".
Make your resolutions align with your desires for personal growth. Aim high, and work hard, and you will avoid feeling bad about yourself and you will fit into that bathing suit.
I believe that it is only when you have discovered, and are living purposefully that you will feel totally fulfilled. So many people are “searching for their purpose”, but I believe that your purpose is on the inside of you and as you live and be conscious of who you are, your purpose will unfold. It is a journey. You do not have to look outside of yourself or to anyone else – it is on the inside of you. The truth is that everyone was created to advance one purpose on this earth, so find yours and stay connected.
The refinery is the inside of you where you think and make suggestions or take decisions by yourself. The refiner is you and no-one else. And the refined is the new you, the outcome of your decision, the evidence of your being. Just a few questions that you should take into the refinery:
What makes you smile?
What were your favorites then? And,what about now?
What activities make you lose track of time?
What makes you feel great about yourself?
Who inspire you most? It could be any of your family members, friends, authors, artists, leaders, etc.And,which qualities inspire you, in each person?
What are you naturally good at? It could be your skills, abilities,talents,gifts etc.
What help do people typically ask of from you?
Take your time to write your answers to these questions and as you answer them, you will gain a clear picture of your purpose.
Additionally, another tool that you can use is to write out a simple mission statement. A personal mission statement provides clarity and gives you a sense of purpose. It defines who you are and how you will live. A mission statement helps you and changes you because it forces you to think through your priorities deeply, carefully, and to align your behaviour with your beliefs.